Model Name: Steven Kan Manufacturer: David and Sylvia Kan Product Generation: 2 Date of Inception: 12 April 1970 Predecessor Model: Michael Kan (Too serious.) Successor Model: Kevin Kan (Too wild. Product line discontinued after 3rd generation.) Product Description: Carbon based, multi tasking, neural-net CPU with emotional co-processor support, A/V capability, multiple prehensile appendages and true random pattern generation. Suitable for employment, academic and leisure applications. OS: Stanford MBA with Harvard BIOS. Optimized Applications: Employment series: Hi-tech manufacturing and/or strategy development. Consulting capable. Academic series: Quantitative. Leisure series: Water polo, volleyball, skiing. OS Compatibility: Mac, Windows. RAM: Aries ROM: Space Knight Cache: $50 Hard Drive: Quite nice Floppy Drive: Only on a bad day Resolution: To leave the toilet seat down. Maximum colors: Hair: Black Eyes: Brown Skin: Tan T-shirt: White Jeans: Blue Jokes: Off-color Power Supply: Pizza, sushi, Dungeness crab, prime rib, or Kellogg's Frosted Mini-Wheats (byte sized). Coke, Red Hook, Chardonnay, Merlot, Gatorade, or fresh-squeezed OJ. Dimensions: Height: 73 (185 cm) Mass: 185 lbs (84 kg) Shirt size: 17 x 36 Suit size: 45L Pant size: 33 waist, 34 inseam Shoe size: 11 Hat size: 7 1/2 Performance: SPECint92: unknown SPECfp92: unknown Bus speed: 50 yard freestyle in 21.79 seconds Bus width: 77 Bench Press: 260 lbs Typing speed: 75 wpm Compatible Peripherals: Asian ice skaters. Striped cats.If you found this link, you must have been really bored. E-mail me.
Back to my bio.