Isn't it funny how kids pronounce (or can't pronounce as the case may be) words? For some reason, Benjamin cannot pronouce Potato Head, so his favorite character is now known as Mr. Tomato Head.
Matthew loves to jump on his bed ... our bed ... the couch ... you get the picture. Benjamin, can now find the DVD he wants, take it out of the case, open the DVD tray, remove the existing DVD, put in his, close the DVD player, and turn on the the TV ... then he waits for one of us to turn the TV selector to DVD and find a scene to jump to. He can also open his bedroom door, which now means, when he's up (6:30) we're (me) up.
Have I ever mentioned that 'teaching kids a lesson' often back fires? Yesterday night, we were getting the kids ready for their baths. Susana got Benjamin's pants and diapers off, but then he ran off and refused to get futher undressed. Susana thought, "fine, you can stay naked. IT WILL TEACH YOU A LESSON when you get cold". Surprise, he peed on the floor. Kids 1, parents 0.
Shrek has been officially replaced by the Incredibles. Matthew and Benjamin can now recite significant portions of the script. Who says kids watch too much TV? As a byproduct of this fascination with the Incredibles, we can also recite significant portions of the script.
Note to self. You never really know how much kids weigh until you carry them around Disneyland for 2 days. Benjamin is DEFINATELY heavier than Matthew. Fortunately, he can also walk further than Matthew. God bless his little legs. We got to see Buzz Lightyear, ride lots of trains, buses, and monorails ... in addition to other kid friendly rides. That weekend, they also got acquainted with Cousin Kyle and Uncle Tango and Auntie Nikita. It was certainly a treat for my parents to have 3 little boys running around. Fortunately, both boys handled the 7 hour trip down and back from LA pretty well.
Earlier, we had gone to the Monterey Bay Aquarium and the Exploratorium. Good fun. Also, we found Train Town, a little train place in Sonoma with ridable trains, a petting zoo, and other rides.
And now, something on the lighter side.
A Story of A Donkey and a Frog (aka. why kids have potty mouths)
WARNING: THE FOLLOWING STORY MAY CONTAIN LANGUAGE NOT SUITABLE FOR MINORS
Princess Fiona (Shrek I and II) is Matthew and Benjamin's favorite movie personality. Why? I have no idea, she just is. Anyways, back to my story. As a result, we probably watch either Shrek I or II at least once a day. Fortunately, they're really good movies otherwise I'd be going nuts about now.
As the various characters appear, Matthew and Benjamin like to point them out and say their names. "Fiona", "Donkey", etc. However, in the case of Shrek, we are of the opinion that they think he's a frog, since he's all green. So, instead of pointing to him and saying, "Shrek", they point and say, "Frog"
Matthew and Benjamin, as articulate as they are, have not learned to fully enunciate all of their syllables yet. This leads to potential problems as, "frog" doesn't come out quite like "frog" but rather sounding a little like "f*ck". This is further complicated because they can't enunciate "donkey" quite right either, as it comes out sounding very much like "dirty". Naturally, when you put the two together, you get a phrase that sounds very much like "dirty f*uck". While I think this is hilarious (and it makes a good party trick to make the kids say this), it could be potentially embarrassing if they kids are out in public going "frog" and earning us dirty looks.
What is the moral of this story you ask? Well, cut kids and their parents some slack. The next time one of my kids points to you and says "dumb f*ck", he might just be pointing to the dump truck behind you.
Oh yes, Matthew can hop now too.
In the meantime, they had their first Christmas of opening presents, first Halloween pumpkin carving, first trip to the Monterrey Bay Aquarium, and lots of other things.
Both Matthew and Benjamin run all over the place and are constant chatterboxes.
I can't believe they are 16 months now. The time goes by so fast and sometimes we don't know or can't remember where it went. I was printing pictures for another office photo board, and we were looking at pictures of Matthew and Benjamin where they were first eating solid foods and would get their baby food all over their faces. It's hard to believe that was a year ago.
I know that my travelling has been hard on everyone. Every week, we pack everyone up on Monday and take them over to their grandparents' place so that Susana has help taking care of them and over to day care. I don't see them again until Friday morning and then when we pick them up Friday afternoon, we lug everything and everybody back to our place. It takes up so much time packing things up and moving people back and forth, and I'm sure it's stressful for the boys to be shuffling around. Then it seems like everything else we have to do gets crammed into the weekends, which doesn't make them a whole lot of fun either. Hopefully things will change for the better once this project is over.
On a side note, it's worth mentioning that Benjamin's favorite book is the "Don't Hit, Don't Bite" book, since he's the one that has been hitting and biting people recently. Ironic. You need to see them with the cat though. They are so cute, chasing him around and putting their faces down into his fur for kisses. It really is amazing how tolerant Pouncer has been of the two of them. Luckily, they've learned to be gentle with him and he just puts up with it - until they start wacking him.
Talking about big fat feet. Benjamin cried everytime we tried to put his shoes on. So we went back to Stride Rite to get him sized for new shoes, and now he's wearing a pair of size 7s. They love to walk around though. Matthew is better about holding onto our hands; Benjamin has more of an independant streak. The other day though, we walked all around Target and the next day, they went to the zoo at Tilden Park and walked everywhere.
Don't you love kids that won't go to bed. Matthew, who is turning into a night owl, refused to go to bed until 4:30 AM over the weekend. He just wouldn't go to bed and kept running around the house.
Speaking of shoes, they have big fat feet. We stopped by Stride Rite to get their first pair of shoes and they measured at size 5 and 5 1/2. When we got to actually try them on, they wouldn't fit. We started with Benjamin (the small feet) and he couldn't get into his 5's. No luck with 5 1/2 nor 5 1/2 wide. We finally got him into a 5 1/2 extra wide and there wasn't a whole lot of extra space. They probably get that from me.
They also know how to chase after their ball and give it back to me - just though that merited mentioning.
I read a new book titled, "I Don't Know How She Does It", a book about balancing motherhood and a career. If you're balancing fatherhood and a career, it will speak to you too. I found myself laughing a lot and seeing our family doing a lot of the same things. I highly recommend this book to any working parent who needs a laugh.
Benjamin is also starting to go down his slide feet first. This causes no little amount of consternation since it involves him climbing up the ladder, standing at the top, then inching his way into a sitting position on the slide. I'm just waiting for him to fall off. Luckily, the slide is on the foamy letter tiles, but everytime I see him climbing on it, I have to rush over and put pillows all over the place.
It is simply amazing how fast the first year goes by. I was holding Kyle last weekend, and couldn't believe that it was only a year ago that Matthew and Benjamin were at the same stage. At times it seems like it couldn't possibily only been a year and at other times, it seems like it was a lifetime ago.
Yesterday, she also pointed out that we have more pictures and sequences of Matthew than we do of Benjamin. I'll have to watch that, because Benjamin certainly isn't any less cute nor does he have a shortage of "Benjamin moments" that need to be capture.
On a sadder note, Matthew and Susana are sick and not doing so well. Matthew is throwing up and has diarrhea. He's not eating a whole lot and is waking up every 2 hours or so. Benjamin has been a real trooper - bless him - but he's gotten shorted on attention a bit. When I get home tomorrow, I need to spend some serious one on one time with him and make him happy.
Yesterday, the boys got up early .. a little too early .. but wouldn't go back to sleep, so I took Benjamin downstairs to play in their playroom. He of course wouldn't go back to sleep, but I curled up in the corner and put my head down. When I woke up, I found that Benjamin had finally gotten tired, crawled up behind me (onto the pillows between me and the wall), and fallen asleep. It made me feel really good.
Kids bring out the best and the worst in us, especially when we have a lot of stress in our lives. The kids get good at pushing our buttons too. I have to admit, ashamedly so, that there have been incidents where either Matthew or Benjamin wouldn't stop crying, I had to make phone calls or was under a deadline to get some work out the door, and I would end up screaming at them and handling them rougher than I should have. It wasn't enough to be hurtful, but it scared them, and it made me feel shitty for doing it. No job is worth that and they certainly don't deserve it. Matthew and Benjamin, I hope you will forgive me.
A lot of people have given me compliments for staying home to watch Matthew and Benjamin on Mondays and Fridays. I tell them that Susana does the same thing, but on Tuesdays - Thursdays, but she points out that she has help - from Mary and her Mom. It's been tough. It's hard enough to care for two babies, but pair that with a huge workload and it can feel overwhelming in a heartbeat. You have to make calls, but can't because they're crying. In order to find a quiet spot, you have to go upstairs, which sets them off even more. You try to focus on writing a document or doing a piece of analysis and can't, because they are fussing, or have to be fed. It ends up being done piecemeal during the day, late at night, or on weekends ... but, we march on and gamely try to get our work done.
Matthew and Benjamin also watched their first football game this weekend, over at Kevin and Jenny's Superbowl party. It was actually their first time interacting with other kids and they seemed to do just fine. They certainly had a full day with shopping, the long drive, and a full day watching football.
We're still holding out for the 5th for Steven and Tiffany.
Boys, I just wanted to tell you all a little about your mommy. She is the best mommy in the world. She works so hard to make sure you're happy, well fed, clean, and comfortable. She's been waking up in the middle of the night for the past 358 days to feed and change you all. She does all this while juggling the dental office and Pouncer. Mommy is totally devoted to the two of you and works extremely long hours to make sure you guys are taken care of. You guys couldn't be luckier.
Since the last update, I have gone back to work ... on a contract basis anyway ... and am back with my former employer, Silver Oak. That's a little bit different, working and commuting to New Mexico 3 days a week. I still get to work from home Mondays and Fridays, but it's hard to get work done with two little ones roaming around and needing constant attention. I work thru it though and make up for it at nights and on weekends. However, I certainly have no regrets staying home with them for 9 months. I was simply amazing to be able to watch them grow up. I'm also fortunate that I have the flexibility to work from home 2 days a week.
The kids got tired of baby food 2-3 months ago. They started wanting table food and even got to the point where they wouldn't take a spoonful of baby food until we put a small piece of chicken on it. Silly kids.
Can't complain about them though. They've been absolutely super kids. There's nothing better than going into their room in the morning, to see Benjamin standing in his crib, with a big grin, just waiting for me ... or watching Matthew climb through his play structure to escape the pen.
Finally, after 11 months, the two boys are actually sleeping thru the night ... on most nights. W00T!!!!!
Right now, Matthew can sit up by himself, pull himself upright on just about anything, is crawling on his hands and knees, and just yesterday, climbed up half a flight of stairs. Of course, I was right behind him, ready to catch him if he fell, which he didn't. Benjamin on the other hand, pulls himself up on just about everything. He hasn't quite figured out how to sit up, though he did this by himself once yesterday and he hasn't started crawling on his hands and knees yet, but does pull himself across the floor pretty quickly.
The boys are really into exploring and therefore require constant supervision. No open door is safe, nothing won't be climbed onto. As a result, our living room has gradually turned into a giant playpen. Just about everything has been moved out of the living room and into the office, which results in a very cluttered office. We have gates and boxes blocking access to the kitchen, fireplace, dining room, and front door.
As an example of the trouble they can get into, the other day I was doing some work in the office, when I noticed the boys had gotten very quiet and in fact, were giggling to each other. I went to the living room to check on them, only to discover that they had gotten into the trashcan and were playing with one of Matthew's diapers (fully loaded). Matthew was on one side with poop loaded diaper wipes and Benjamin was on the other side waving the diaper around. Both looked very pleased with themselves. Presented with 2 poop-covered boys and poop on the floor, the only thing I could do was laugh. Luckily it was bath day for them
I just started a contracting assignment with Silver Oak. So, this is my first return to the working world. It'll be interesting to see how this works out, but I certainly have no regrets spending the last 9 months as a stay at home dad. It has been such a rewarding experience to watch how they've changed and grown day by day.
OK, I admit that I am getting really lame at keeping this updated. I'll try to do a better job. So what's new in Matthew and Benjamin's life?
We packed up the family and headed over to Boston for a family wedding. This involved the red-eye to Boston, a full weekend of new people, strange places, and odd hours, and the 5-hour flight back to San Franciso. Luckily, the two boys did fine and survived the weekend in good spirits, which resulted in Mom & Dad finishing the weekend in good spirits.
It's a good thing that their uncle Kevin was on the same flight as us. We had a totally packed car and our suitcase was crammed to the top with diapers, clothes, formula, toys .... you name it, we had it - except for a spare spoon to replace the one we left at the restaurant, or a bottle warmer to heat up water for their meals, and ... Boy, you never really realize how valuable hot water on-demand is, until you are trying to feed kids.
In any case, the boys were a bit hit at the wedding. People couldn't get enough of them and one of my aunts even threatened to take them home with her. They were good little troopers though and gamely endured all the attention, which they love, and returned as much affection as they received.
The flight back was a little trickier. They were tired, it wasn't naptime, the plane was noisy ... so they got a little worked up. Finally, after an hour of so, they finally calmed down and slept the rest of the flight with brief awake spells here and there. I think after this weekend, all 4 of us were pretty happy to be home and in familar surroundings. Benjamin's face practically lit up when we pulled out his favorite playmat for him.
Benjamin has his first 2 teeth coming in - 2 lower teeth. Actually, both boys have teeth coming in, it's just that you can see Benjamin's, but both are getting a little irritable and are chewing on a lot of things
Over the last 2 months, we keeping up with Matthew and Benjamin's increased mobility has been a challenge. Here is a video of Matthew's first days of rolling. Both babies can now roll front-to-back and back-to-front. Matthew learned how to roll about a month before Benjamin did, but now Benjamin has caught right up and both have to be watched like hawks. The other day, I was doing some work and heard some clanking in the living room. I thought it was coming from outside, so I went back to doing my work. The clanking continued, so I thought I should have a look. Lo and behold, Benjamin, who up to then had not done much rolling, has rolled himself off his play mat, across the living room, and up against the wine rack - hence the clanking sound. Since then, I have appeared on numerous occassions, at the nick of time, to prevent both of them from rolling off the bed. Guess it's time to baby-proof the house.
The other way the babies get around in in their walker. Their auntie Mary got them a walker and now they scoot around in either the kitchen or the dining room. Lucky for them, we replaced the carpet in the dining room with a Pergo floor. This gives them a fairly large and open room in which to scoot about - get the feeling that our house is turning into a giant play pen?
For some reason, both boys started sticking their tongues out. They seem to do this a lot. They just stick out their tongues and wave them around for everyone to see.
Solid smelly poops vs runny smelly poops. 'nuff said
They have been eating solid foods for 2 months now. I think we have introduced them to green beans, butternut squash, sweet potatos, apples, pears, turkey & rice, chicken & broccoli, and a couple of other things ... oh, and of course rice cereal. If we ever forget what they ate, all we have to do is check their diapers later in the day or the next day. I guess they are getting enough to eat because they're both 19 pounds now and nearly 29 inches in length.
It's getting harder and harder to keep up with the updates, but so much has happened in the last month:
Benjamin actually sleeps through the night now, though Matthew still gets up 1-2 times a night. Hopefully we'll get him on a all-night schedule soon ... /me keeps fingers crossed.
They have also experienced their public debut, both at a Kan family dinner and then at Easter dinner - given that the were surrounded by a bunch of noisy people whom they had never met, they came through with flying colors and hardly a cry from either one of them.
Being a stay at home dad is coming easier now. I've definately learned a lot of the tips of the trade and we have one of Susana's cousins coming in to help us out a couple of hours a week. She is a wealth of baby knowledge and we are trying to learn as much as possible. Meanwhile, I spend a lot of time just getting them to smile and laugh and when I'm rewarded with a giggle and cooing, it makes it all worthwhile.
Here they are again at 5, 45, and 90 days old:
Tonight, Matthew and Benjamin leave our bedroom and sleep in their own room. They still share a crib (as an aside, they have grown enough where they no longer fit widthwise in the crib, so they have to be laid lengthwise) but will be sleeping alone for the first time. Well see how they take to that.
I've got a bunch of new pictures to upload and a few more anecdotes to write, so I'll get them up later this week - ok, got the pictures loaded. They are in the Set 2 link to the left.
Note to self: Avoid diapers with lots of adhesive tape. Since we use the top front of the diaper to wipe up poop, the tape has a tendency to stick to the boys' testicles - ouch!!
On another note, Susana finally asked Dr. Maiorello (her OBGYN) about what really happened on the day of her delivery. As some might recall, we actually had to perform an emergency c-section because of some bleeding. Even at that time, Susana suspected that things might have been pretty bad because Dr. Maiorello got really calm. I guess it's a bad thing when doctors get really calm. He recommended an immediate c-section and we quickly agreed. Post delivery, we found out that Matthew's placenta had ruptured, thus the bleeding, and had we waited, it would have caused one or more babies to be distressed.
We found out yesterday how serious that was. Had we not caught it early or had we decided to wait, Susana could have lost a dangerous amount of blood and we could have lost both babies. Fortunately, the Lord was with us that day, as He has been throughout this entire event, and everything turned out perfectly. It is a reminder however, of how quickly things can go really badly OR how quickly things can go from bad to good ... really good.
BTW, I added a section on key terms and new pictures will be posted soon.
Warning! Diaper ambush!!!! The babies are smart. So smart, that they know how to create diversions. We always put an absorbant napkin up on the babies chest to catch any errant pee that might come out during a changing. Well, Benjamin would have none of this. During the changing, he started to poop ... and poop ... and poop (the misdirection). As we scrambled for tissues and wipes to catch all of the poop before it got all over the changing pad, he took this opportunity (and our lack of focus) to pee on his head. Sigh.
On to more important milestones. Matthew finally threw up and Benjamin had milk come out of his nose ... I guess that's a sign that he's had enough milk. It seems like their feeding schedules have changed ... for the worse. We are not getting up at night, somewhere in the area of every 2-2.5 hours. Did I mention that I am barely functional when awaken from a deep sleep. We seemed to have worked out a schedule where Susana does most of the midnight feedings, but takes naps during the afternoon. I handle a lot of the chores (cleaning, changings, feedings, etc) during the afternoon so that she can rest.
On another note, I had my first night and day away from the boys. I had to fly out to Washington DC to conclude some unfinished business. It's not easy leaving a pair of newborns and saying goodbye to them. Sigh. This was my first night away from my little guys and my first day away from them.
Benjamin smiled at me for the first time yesterday - a real, distinct smile - just enough to make my day.
I can't believe the boys are a month old already. Sometimes it just seems like yesterday that we stopped off at Peets before heading to the delivery ward, and at other times, it seems like it's been a lifetime. They're getting big. I can already see that, in their weight when I hold them, Matthew's cheeks are filling out, their legs are so stick-like. Guess we'll find out how much weight they've put on when we visit the doctor on Thursday.
| "I don't know why I'm wiping your face, you're just going to get milk crust on it again" |
Can you believe this came from my ultra clean, ultra sanitary wife Susana, the dentist? My response was, "this is like saying, "Why vacuum? The floor is just going to get dirty again""
Today was my first solo day of taking care of the kids -- don't worry, they're OK. After all, how much trouble can they get into when they just lie there in bed?
Even though the babies are less than 3 weeks old, I can't believe how different they are. Each one has their own distinct personality. Matthew his a little more squirmy, more apt to cry, and has a very mischevious look to his face. Benjamin on the other hand is much more mellow, slow to cry, gets a worried or thoughtful look on his face, and seems to value sleep highly. We'll see how much of this continues to manifest over the next couple of months.
On another note, Susana is making good progress on losing her pregnancy weight. At peak, she was 133 lbs, up from her normal weight of 100 lbs - a gain of 33%. As of last weighing, she was back down to 106 lbs. Normal clothes fit, she can put on her own socks again, life is good.
At the same time, the babies are making good progress. Matthew's jaundice has improved and both babies added 9 ounces in weight.
OMG!!!! 5 hours of uninterrupted sleep last night. Here's a picture of the two kids taken at Marin General Hospital
This past weekend, I experienced two key milestones: I got peed on and Matthew spit up. How's that for progress? Susana and I estimated that we spend 8-10 hours per day feeding the babies and changing diapers. The babies eat every 2-3 hours during the day and twice at night - a feeding and a diaper change takes approximately an hour.
On a positive note, the babies have been extremely well tempered. Very little crying, except when they're cold. We feed them late a night and then they typically wake up once during the night. We're still only getting 4-5 hours of sleep a night in chunks here and there.
The babies are now 8 days old have added an ounce from yesterday - woo hoo.
Added more pics
